The agony of grief and mourning.
Christmas is coming and everyone is happy and excited. This is a time when families start preparing for the fun of Father Christmas and the party season, presents, fun and light-hearted family festivities. We are busy with preparations such as ordering the turkey, and making the Christmas pudding. We are occupied with hustle and bustle and fun filled evenings, making decorations, choosing presents and making plans.
Oh, if only this was true for everyone. Whilst many families are full of excitement for the coming festivities there are so many people who are lonely, unhappy and grieving. It is a sad fact that many people die in winter and ironically often around the time of Christmas when the nights are long, dark and cold.
So, far from Christmas being a happy time, for some people it can also be fraught with sadness, loneliness and grief. The agony of grief is so complex. I have been to several funerals recently and many of my friends are going through the pain of suddenly finding themselves alone.
Of course, if we are lucky enough to have a loving family and good friends to support us at a time of grief, then we are fortunate indeed. Counselling people who have been bereaved is a very salutary experience. It is not all about sentimental thoughts. I have found that people who are grieving feel, not only absolutely alone, but are often extremely angry. Deep thoughts about life and death are complex and take us to the edge of reason and not only is grief very lonely and painful but it is also utterly exhausting.
This is a time when one really has to take extra care of oneself. Eating fresh fruit and vegetables, lovely crisp autumn walks on the beach, fresh air and exercise and early nights all support us when we feel down. There is a strong relationship between our spiritual health and our physical wellbeing. I consider that the spirit and soul control emotions, which, when disturbed, impact on function. When we are unhappy we become extremely vulnerable to disease and viruses Winter flu viruses proliferate and circulate and mutate in the winter, so we are all a bit vulnerable at this time of year anyway and especially so if we are feeling low.
We are, however, so fortunate in Jersey because we have a very loving and kind community spirit and I am always stunned by the number of charities and people who give their time in such generous ways. It is really quite moving how kind people are and we never need to be lonely. It is, sometimes, just a case of knowing who to turn to.
I am so moved to see how charitable organisations such as St John Ambulance support the people around them with such generosity of spirit. Over and over again, I have witnessed loving kindness and such dedication. Our volunteers give up so much time to be there for the people of the Island. Our wonderful volunteers, ensure that people have fun at sporting events and outings that they so love, by keeping us all safe. There are so many unsung heroes in the charitable organisations. I have witnessed such amazing community within the St John Ambulance family. The leaders, the teachers, the staff all give up their time in the most dedicated way. Likewise the retired members of the Fellowship all take care of each other. Whilst St John Ambulance is a very special family, I am quite certain that there are many other charities on the island that are equally special. I have always thought that if you have been grief-struck, the rewards, that you receive by joining a charity and giving your free time is so healing and also ensures that you become part of a community. Many of the charities need volunteers. so by joining a chosen charity and offering your time may not just be invaluable for the community but one of the most rewarding ways of helping yourself as well.
In the Phytobiophysics Flower formula range we have some very special flower formulas called FF2 White Rose for emotional recovery, FF8 Rosemary for uplifting the soul and above all FF11 Hawthorn called “Heartache.”
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